Francesca Iucci
Photography by Talles Alves, via Unsplash
Today I took an old picture of myself and stared at it.
I looked at it long enough for it to become the abstract version
of an impossible reality.
My eyes focused on arms, stomach, and legs,
The gelatinous skin moving from one side to the other, speaking to me.
I remember the despair I felt getting that picture taken,
My body being the guest who wasn’t invited to the party
But decided to show up anyway when it became too late to leave.
I remember the atrocity of buying new jeans,
And realising the need for a bigger size than I expected.
I remember the fear of short skirts and dresses,
Because surely they couldn’t suit me.
I reflect on how they’re now things I wear with pride.
Today I stare at that picture again;
I know my body has changed,
But I am stunned at the discovery that,
As of today,
The physique in that old picture actually looks pretty great.
My arms, stomach, legs,
They’re all thicker now that they were back then.
Yet,
That body used to be my terrible enemy.
I still have stretch marks,
cellulite,
Big legs,
But I know that my body only becomes an obstacle
If I let it be one.
A curious realisation, isn’t it?
Discovering that the negativity scattered in one’s head
Holds in itself the power to change what our eyes perceive as reality.
Francesca Iucci
Francesca Iucci is currently studying English literature at the University of York, but she’s originally from Rome. When she was fifteen and going through a rough time because of anxiety, she found in poetry the means to understand her emotions more clearly, and it has remained through the years something she feels the need to do whenever she’s not feeling at her best.
Ever since she got out of the black hole she was in, Francesca’s always tried to use her past experiences to her advantage and is slowly learning to love herself for who she is (all flaws are welcome). She’d love to turn writing into a career someday, and dreams of becoming a screenwriter. She is completely in love with Taylor Swift and everything she does, even though her cat comes in close second.
