Rhiannon Grist

Photography by Autumn Goodman via Unsplash

Content Warning: explicit violence

I bought myself a crown off Amazon

A cheap plastic thing with glued on jewels

And named myself king of myself

I wrote a constitution and compiled laws

But I kept breaking them

I couldn’t be tolerated

I revolted, I rebelled, I laid down the law

I put myself in irons

But I was unrepentant

I had no choice

So, I lopped off my head

Got blood on my crown

Sorry, no refunds, Amazon said

Rhiannon Grist

Rhiannon is a Welsh writer living and working in beautiful Edinburgh. She was a member of both the Traverse and Royal Court young writers groups and now writes and performs as part of Writers Bloc. She lives with a data analyst called Dale and an anatomical skeleton called Bob. All her stories are true.